


Choices

by gleefulmusings



Category: Glee
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Friendship, M/M, Masturbation, Mild Language, Romance, Season/Series 01, Sexual Fantasy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-09
Updated: 2012-10-21
Packaged: 2017-11-01 16:53:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 22,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/359127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gleefulmusings/pseuds/gleefulmusings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt tells Finn the truth about Beth's paternity before Rachel can, opening doors to possibilities Finn never even conceived.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Revelations

Finn hesitantly stepped into the choir room, narrowing his eyes in an attempt to adjust to the dark. He blinked dumbly several times before remembering that the room was outfitted with electricity. Sighing to himself, he reached over and flipped the switch to turn on the overhead lights.

He wasn't sure what he was doing here. Well, he was meeting Kurt, of course, but he didn't know why. Kurt had caught up with him in the hall earlier that day between classes and asked for this meeting. Finn had been reluctant; he had cottoned on to Kurt's crush and, while flattered, it made him uneasy. It wasn't as though he was frightened of Kurt – the dude was pretty tiny – but he didn't want to be forced to break the little guy's heart.

Kurt was actually pretty awesome and had turned into a really good friend, maybe even his best friend. He didn't want some stupid crush to get in the way of that. So when Kurt had asked to meet after school, alone, Finn had almost said no. But Kurt's eyes had been doing that thing where they got impossibly wide and shiny and reflected all kinds of different colors like some really amazing kaleidoscope.

And the way Kurt had wrung his hands and stumbled over his words, which, the hell? Kurt was never flustered, at least not to the point where it affected his speech. And since when did Kurt fidget? But he _had_ fidgeted, tugging restlessly at his clothes, which were totally crazy but still worked for him.

Seeing Kurt so discombobulated was weird, and a little upsetting, because Finn knew whatever Kurt wanted to discuss was major and probably something he didn't want to hear. But he was curious and had certainly talked Kurt's ear off about his myriad problems, so he figured he owed the guy and agreed.

As he waited for Kurt to arrive, Finn beganmentally steeling himself in preparation. If this was about what he _thought_ it was about, he would have to be forceful in his stance. He truly didn't want to hurt Kurt's feelings, but he wasn't interested in him that way and he knew Kurt could be hardheaded when he became fixated on something he wanted.

So he would have to handle this as delicately as possible so that Kurt understood once and for all that nothing would ever happen between them in that way. Really, he should have done it a while ago, but he had ignored it and hoped it would just go away.

All Finn knew was that it would totally suck if he left this room with one less friend. Friends were in pretty short supply for him lately, especially ones as kind and understanding as Kurt.

"You look constipated."

Finn startled and spun around on his heel, only to take a step back at Kurt's appearance, which could only be described as _not Kurt_. His hair was all mussed like he had been pulling on it, and he seemed thinner somehow. His clothes, which had fit perfectly this morning, looked like they were hanging on him. His lips were swollen and looked like he had chewed them raw – or as though he had just escaped an intense makeout session in a janitor's closet.

Whoa. Had Kurt been making out with someone? _Who?_

He stomped down a tiny flare of jealousy. He wasn't jealous but, okay, maybe he kind of liked the attention Kurt gave him. Quinn was cold and indifferent to him; normally, he'd blame the pregnancy hormones or whatever, but she had always been like that. Rachel was a little scary with her exuberance. Kurt struck a nice balance.

_Shut up, brain_.

"What's up, Kurt?" he carefully asked, taking a step toward the other boy. He frowned when Kurt visibly flinched and took a step back.

Whoa, was Kurt scared of him or something? He thought they had gotten past that when he had stopped, well, bullying him. He winced. God, he had been such a jackass. His mom would flay him alive if she ever found out how he had treated other kids.

"Kurt," he said more quietly, "what's wrong?"

Kurt blinked owlishly, pursing his lips so tightly they all but disappeared. Which was pretty tight, considering how big Kurt's lips were. Not that Finn noticed such things.

Kurt swallowed heavily. "Have you ever heard the phrase 'don't shoot the messenger'?" he asked.

Finn slowly shook his head.

"Of course not," Kurt sighed, running his fingers through his messy hair and causing it to stand on end. "I…I…have to tell you something."

Finn suppressed a groan. He so didn't want to do this, but he knew there was no way out of it. If Kurt was going to force the issue, which was pretty brave of him, actually, the least he could do was listen, even though he was totally uncomfortable and a little angry. "Okay."

"We should sit down," Kurt said decidedly. "You sit here, and I'm going to sit…over there." He all but ran across the room, collapsing on a chair, under which he primly folded his legs. He started wringing his hands again, muttering under his breath.

Finn sat down gingerly. Jesus, was Kurt afraid he was going to hit him or something? Not cool. He wasn't Puck. Sure, he was nervous and awkward and a whole lot of other uncomfortable things, but he wasn't violent.

"This," Kurt whispered, "this shouldn't come from me, but when I…" He trailed off, shaking his head angrily. "It's not right what they're doing. How could they? It's just…so… _wrong_."

Finn frowned. What the hell was happening?

Kurt anxiously blew out a breath. "Finn," he said, "you know how Mercedes is pretty much Gossip Central?"

Finn nodded uncertainly. He didn't know Mercedes well, but well enough to know she was always talking about other people. For someone who wasn't overly popular, she was better connected than Jacob Ben Israel.

Oh. This was about gossip? Not Kurt's gay love for him? He allowed himself to relax.

"When she told me, at first I couldn't believe it," Kurt babbled. "I just didn't understand how they could be so heartless, so cruel. Then I tried to deny it, because no matter how scared she was, I had to believe that she was a better person than that, despite the evidence to the contrary. Not that I'm some paragon of virtue, but I do have standards. I have morals and ethics and…and…I'm just _so sorry_ , Finn!"

Finn's eyes widened as Kurt's face just _collapsed_ and suddenly there were tears streaking his cheeks and his hands, shaking as if with palsy, flew to cover his face and Kurt was _sobbing_. Finn had no idea what to do or what to say. He'd spent over a year watching Kurt get hassled for no good reason other than being alive, and he had never, _ever_ seen the boy cry. He didn't even realize Kurt knew how. He had always just seemed too strong for something like that.

A surge of protectiveness overwhelmed him and he flew across the room to the seat next to Kurt and hesitantly patted the other boy's shoulder, upset when Kurt cringed and pulled away. He had to fix this somehow. He didn't like seeing Kurt so upset, especially over something as stupid as gossip. That was just ridiculous.

"So Mercedes told you something bad?" he whispered.

Kurt nodded.

Finn frowned. "Was it about you?"

A shake of the head.

Oh. Well, if it wasn't about Kurt, but Kurt had asked to meet him alone…

"Was it about me?"

Kurt nodded miserably.

Finn sighed. He didn't know why he should even be bothered to be upset. Ever since the news of Quinn's pregnancy had broken, he was the focus of the majority of the school's gossip. Each day was filled with more vicious lies and speculation and slander. Why should today be any different?

But Kurt was so upset and, if Finn was interpreting it correctly, Kurt was upset _for_ him, which meant whatever he heard must have been really heinous. It was almost nice, having someone care about him that much, worry for him so much. And it was pretty awesome that Kurt had come to him directly rather than just passing the rumors around or adding to them or whatever.

"What did you hear?" he asked.

Kurt brought his hands from his face and looked at Finn with such abject sadness – not pity, but a deep _sorrow_ – that Finn felt his mouth dry.

"Tell me," he whispered.

Kurt bit down on his lip so forcefully it drew blood. "Mercedes doesn't know I'm here. She didn't want me to tell you this. None of them did."

Finn's brow furrowed. "None of who?"

"Whom," Kurt murmured. "The Glee Club. But you _should_ know." He stood and angrily began pacing. "How can they call themselves your friends and keep this from you?" He shook his head. "It's not _right_. And do they really think so little of _me_ that they believe I _wouldn't_ tell you? Some of them are supposed to be my best friends and they don't know me _at all_! Sure, I'm lovesick, but I'm not _stupid_. I know you could never love me back. But that's not important! They should tell you!"

Finn reeled back as if struck. So, there it was. Kurt loved him. It wasn't anything he hadn't suspected, hadn't already known, but it still somewhat shocking to hear. For some inexplicable reason, he felt bad. He felt guilty that he couldn't return Kurt's feelings. But he couldn't and Kurt seemed to realize that, to understand.

Finn shook his head to clear it. But this wasn't about that.

This was about something really wrong, something that everyone else knew that he didn't. Something that Kurt knew which the others didn't want Kurt to tell him. But here Kurt was, humiliating himself because he was determined to tell the truth, to do the right thing.

"You're my friend," Kurt whispered. "I can't lie to you."

"You can tell me anything, Kurt."

And it was true. He would believe whatever Kurt told him, because in this moment, he knew Kurt's only real concern was for __him_ _ alone.

Kurt wrapped his arms around his thin body and stared down at the floor. "I just," he sniffled, "I don't want you to hate me."

Finn stood and crossed over to him. "I could never hate you, Kurt. You're a really cool dude who's done nothing but put up with my drama for months, let alone all the shit I put you through with Puck and those other douchebags. We're friends, okay? I trust you tell to me the truth. And I promise that whatever you tell me, we'll still be friends."

Kurt looked up at him, total disbelief in his eyes. And, wow, that kind of hurt. Did Kurt not trust _him_? Was Kurt really that scared of him? Or was the rumor really that bad?

Finn decided it was best if he sat back down, so he did. "I need to you tell me, Kurt. Tell me what this is about, because I'm beginning to freak."

Kurt hastily wiped his face and sat down next to Finn. "It's about you and Quinn and…and Drizzle," he said softly.

At once, a sappy smile overtook Finn's face. Sure, the majority of his life these past few months had been manic and he was terrified that, in just a few more, he would be responsible for this tiny life, but he loved his baby. He had never given much consideration to being a father, other than that it was something he knew he eventually wanted. It had happened much sooner than he had expected and he was scrambling to prepare, but he was excited.

Yeah, he had ruined Quinn's life, and probably his own, and he had been scared his mother would react the way Quinn's parents had, but his mom had been awesome. So had the other kids in Glee. He finally had real friends that he knew he could depend on, and Kurt had led the charge. He didn't think he'd ever be able to tell Kurt just how much his support meant.

But then Kurt's words, his _tone_ , began to filter through his happy haze and he slowly began to feel bewildered, and then scared, and then there was a trace of bitter sadness that was desperate to be released.

Finn blinked and slowly raised his eyes to meet those of Kurt. "Who told Mercedes this gossip?"

Kurt looked like a terrified bunny as he swallowed heavily. "Puck."

And it was the complete absence of any emotion or inflection in Kurt's voice that did Finn in.

Suddenly, he _knew_.

Suddenly there was confirmation of his doubts about Quinn's love for him. Suddenly all of the secret mutterings between Quinn and Puck made sense, though they had never spoken loud enough for him to overhear their words. Suddenly why Quinn and Puck always seemed to be walking on eggshells around him was given a reason.

Suddenly his denial about the impossibility of impregnating Quinn via fucking _hot tub_ was shattered. He knew he wasn't that smart, but he had taken and passed Human Sexuality. But as frightened as he had been by the prospect of a baby, his desire _for_ that baby overwhelmed his common sense. Because he did want to be a father. He wanted to be the father that his own never had the chance of being, and he wanted to do a good job.

Suddenly, why Kurt just looked _so damn sorry_ and terrified of him and desperate not to hurt him made sense.

"It's Puck's baby."

Kurt flinched harshly as his tears renewed themselves, and Finn had the hysterical reaction of wanting to comfort the other boy.

"Why are you telling me?"

Kurt was silent for a very long time before releasing a shaky breath. "Because I understand what she means to you. The baby, I mean."

"How?" Finn asked in a small voice.

"When you lose a parent, or if you've never known one, your perception of family is altered," Kurt slowly explained. Finn understood that Kurt wasn't placating him or dumbing things down, but struggling to give words to the thoughts in his head. "When my mom died, my dad and I had only each other. Family became the most important thing to both of us." He sighed and turned away. "I've always wanted to be a father, Finn, but I know that, most likely, that will never happen."

"Because you're gay?"

Kurt nodded.

"Rachel has two dads."

Kurt shuddered. "An experiment which has proven it should never be repeated."

Against his will, Finn laughed.

"I could go the Rachel route," Kurt continued, "but that's a long process and is very expensive, and there's no guarantee that it would work. And maybe I'm just old-fashioned, but I want to be married before I have children. I doubt that will ever happen here in Ohio, and many states don't allow gay couples to adopt."

Finn suddenly grew enraged that Kurt – sweet, gentle Kurt – who had been put through so much just because of the way he was born, wouldn't be allowed to get married like straight people. And Finn sometimes watched the news. He knew that more than half of marriages ended up in divorce. What was so sacred about _that_? Kurt would be a great wife! Or husband. However that stuff worked. And Kurt would be an awesome dad.

Kurt stared into Finn's eyes. "I just kept thinking about how I would feel if I were in your place. I don't want to hurt you, Finn. I never want to be the one to cause you pain. I know how much you love that baby and I hate that I'm the one who's telling this to you. I've spent the past three days debating with myself over whether I should tell you at all, but after another night without sleep, I just knew that I couldn't be part of the lie."

Finn's mind whirled. Kurt wanted to protect him. Kurt had lost sleep over him. Kurt knew he'd probably lose all of his friends for going against them. But, in the end, Kurt had been a _man_ about it, certainly more than Puck had ever been, and told the truth, because Kurt loved him so purely.

"The more I thought about what they were doing, the angrier I got," Kurt admitted. "Part of me wants to excuse Quinn's behavior, because I can only imagine how terrified she is. Her life is forever changed. Her own parents threw her out of her house like she was a bag of trash, and a large part of that is my fault, because I gave you the worst advice ever."

"That wasn't your fault!" Finn hotly denied. Jesus, was Kurt actually trying to take responsibility for that? Ridiculous!

"I should have seen it coming," Kurt whispered, shaking his head. "I should have seen how it could backfire. How stupid and naïve am I that I thought a _song_ could somehow magically fix everything?"

Finn snorted. "In case you missed the memo, you're sixteen, Kurt. Just like me, and Quinn, and Puck. None of us knows what we're doing. We just do the best we can. I didn't blame you for that hot mess, and neither did Quinn."

Kurt flinched. "All of her friends have turned their backs on her," he said softly. "She's treated like a leper in this school. I know how that feels."

Guilt began clawing at Finn's chest. He knew that he was partly to blame for Kurt's suffering, and that just tore him up inside. But he didn't think he could ever forgive Quinn.

"I'm not saying you should forgive her."

Whoa. Could Kurt read minds?

"I know it's been terrible for you, too," Kurt added, "but you don't spend the day with perfect strangers walking up to you and calling you a whore right to your face."

Finn startled and looked down at his hands, now folded in his lap. He _did_ feel sorry for Quinn, as much as he didn't want to.

"I don't know why she did what she did," Kurt said. "I don't know how she could have cheated on you, how she could have treated you that way. I _never_ would have…" he trailed off, flushing heavily and looking away.

Something else clawed at Finn's chest. He wasn't sure what it was, couldn't name the emotion, but there was this indistinct roaring in his ears which demanded he walk over there and take Kurt in his arms and…

_No!_

"Well, that's irrelevant," Kurt snapped off, getting himself under control. "I can't pretend to understand her motives. I'm sure the guilt must eat away at her. You've done everything right: you accepted what you thought was your responsibility; you opened your home to her; you even got a job where you have to pretend to be handicapped just so you can provide for that baby." He raised his gaze. "You, Finn Hudson, are an incredibly honorable man."

Butterflies. How did butterflies find their way into his stomach? Finn wondered.

Kurt sighed again, this little puff of air that had a musical quality which should have seemed absurd, but was instead somehow charming. "Puck disgusts me. He is supposed to be your best friend, but he slept with your girlfriend and got her pregnant. I have no idea how he feels about that. For all I know, he's wanted to tell you for months that he's the father, but Quinn convinced him not to. I just don't know. Maybe I just don't want to believe that anyone could be so horrible."

Rage coursed through Finn's veins.

"What I do know is that Quinn truly _wants_ you to be the father. She does love you. I can tell just by looking at her. She knows what a good man you are, how good a father you will be, and she doesn't want to lose you. But to lie to you about something so important…I'm so sorry, Finn."

Finn couldn't deal with those thoughts right now. "What about the others in Glee?"

At once, Kurt's face clouded with fury. He hopped out of his chair and resumed his pacing. "They make me _sick_ , Mercedes included! They didn't want to tell you the truth because they're scared you'll freak out, quit Glee, and we'll bomb at Sectionals." He kicked out at his chair, sending it flying across the room. "Who gives a _fuck_ about Sectionals?"

Finn cringed. He had never, _ever_ heard Kurt swear. He had never seen Kurt so enraged. He had never seen Kurt look so beautiful.

_Gah!_

"Sure I want to win," Kurt bellowed. "Of course I don't want to lose glee club! But we're talking about people's _lives_. We're talking about a baby who will soon make her way into this world. And they want to fret over some stupid singing competition? You're _so much_ more important than some contest! They disgust me! They're just as guilty of using you as Puck and Quinn are! I thought I knew Mercedes, but apparently I was wrong. Artie and Tina have been my best friends for years, and now I realize that I must not know them very well if they're willing to lie to your face about something so important. How could they serenade you with that song, promising to stand by you, to let you _lean_ on them, only to go back on their word when things get tough? I mean, I know I'm selfish, but that's just _cruel_."

Finn shook his head. No, Kurt wasn't selfish. Self-absorbed, maybe, as most kids their age, including himself, were, but certainly not selfish.

Suddenly Kurt was kneeling before him and Finn's mind stopped working altogether and he had to chase away unbidden images which were forming in his mind.

"I'm so sorry, Finn," Kurt said. "I wish I knew what to say, how to help you." He fell silent for a minute. "The only thing I can suggest," he said softly, "is to take a very hard look at what _you_ want. So many decisions have been made for you; so many of your choices have been taken out of your hands. Like I said, Quinn wants you to be the father, so if you decide you can live with this, if you decide that being a father is more important than how that child was conceived, then claim her, regardless of your feelings for Quinn, whatever they might be."

Shock had given way to deep sadness for Finn, and as the tears slipped from his eyes, Kurt reached up to wipe them away before stopping himself. Finn found that he craved that touch more than he ever had anything else.

"If you decide that you can't raise another man's child, there's no shame in that. You don't have to do anything you don't want to. You don't have to feel guilty for how _other_ people have behaved. If you want to forgive them, that's your choice. If you want to stand at Quinn's side, then do so; don't worry about Puck or Rachel."

Kurt sighed. "As it stands right now, Rachel is the only member of Glee who doesn't know the truth. They don't plan on telling her, because they know she would come running to you, most likely in a bid for you to dump Quinn and be with her. If she's what you want, then be with her. You have the choice as to whether you walk away from Quinn, from both Quinn and Puck, and from Rachel, or only some of them."

Finn released a strangled sob. "I…I don't know what to do," he rasped.

Kurt pressed his lips together and made a clucking noise. "I know, sweetheart, but these decisions are yours. No one else can or should make them. Take the time to think about them before you rush into anything, or before you say or do something you can't take back and will eventually regret."

No one other than his mom had ever called him sweetheart. He thought it sounded right coming from Kurt's mouth.

"What would you do?" Finn whispered.

Kurt winced. "I honestly don't know. I don't know enough about all of you and your relationships to each other even to hazard a guess. Think about your feelings for Quinn. If you love her, truly love her, think about whether you'd be able to forgive her and still be with her. Make sure that if you do forgive her, that it's for the right reasons. Don't forgive her for the sake of the baby, otherwise your resentment will grow and fester. It will come between you and, in the long run, also hurt the baby.

"As for Puck, well, you know what I think about him, but you've been best friends for as long as I can remember. Are you willing to throw all of that away?"

"What if it was never real?" Finn asked.

Kurt nodded. "That's possible. We've both seen how people in this school use each other for the sake of popularity. So think about whether or not Puck is, this instance excepted, a good friend. Could you ever trust him again, or would you always be worried that he would repeat this mistake? You should try and determine whether or not he really loves Quinn or if he slept with her just to take something away from you. I could never begin to understand how his mind works, and I really don't want to."

Finn laughed, a raw, hoarse sound that echoed around the room and made them both cringe.

"But if he's sorry," Kurt added, "if he desires your forgiveness and knows how badly he messed up, you might be able to salvage your friendship. Only you can decide whether or not he's worth your time."

"I hate them both so much right now," Finn confessed.

"I'd be surprised if you didn't. I think it's natural. But hate is a very strong emotion, Finn. It takes a lot out of you to maintain that level of hostility. And, in the end, is it even worth it? Does it get you anything? Will it make you feel better? Probably not."

"You're very smart."

Kurt quirked his lips. "Not so much. I just have experience at being hurt."

"Because of me."

Kurt tilted his head and considered that statement. "In part," he agreed, "but whatever you've done to me is in the past and was never as bad as what others have done. Although, I have to admit, the pee balloons were particularly disgusting."

Finn flushed with shame. "I'm so sorry."

Kurt smiled. "I know you are. That's why I was able to forgive you."

"I don't deserve it."

Kurt tutted. "That's not for you to decide. I was the one who was wronged. Even if you hadn't apologized, I still would have forgiven you. Being angry all of the time gets me nowhere. You can hate the actions of people without hating the people themselves."

He stood and flicked the dust off his jeans. "I have to go. It's getting late and my dad will worry." He adjusted the strap of his messenger bag and hesitantly laid his hand on Finn's shoulder. "I just want you to know, whatever you decide, I'll support you. And if you need anything, even if it's just to talk, you have my number, okay?"

Finn nodded. "You didn't have to tell me."

"Yes, I did," Kurt countered, "because all I could think of was how I would feel if I were in your position. I treated you like I would want to be treated." He patted Finn's shoulder and headed toward the door, stopping just as he went to open it.

"I remember something I read after Mom died," he said. "It's not that life _must_ go on, Finn, but that it _does_ go on, and that's the end of it. You have choices now, so make your life into something you want. You're the only one who can. And I was serious before; if you need me, call, no matter what time." He cleared his throat. "I'll see you tomorrow."

Finn watched as Kurt darted out of the room, looking quickly down each side of the hall, waiting for someone to jump out and attack him. He watched as Kurt donned his mask of disdain and superiority and then strut away.

"Thank you," Finn whispered to the empty room.


	2. Interventions

Quinn was spending the night at Santana's house, for which Finn was grateful, though he was also confused. He hadn't thought they were still friends, if they ever really were. He wasn't sure Santana actually had friends other than Brittany; she'd never acted like she needed or wanted anyone other than Brittany.

Regardless, Quinn was gone for the night and he wouldn't have to deal with her until tomorrow. Hopefully he would manage to get himself under control by then, because he really wasn't interested in having a scene at school. He knew a blowup was coming eventually, but he wanted to be as prepared as possible. He also knew that when he got upset he was easily manipulated, and Quinn was apparently very good at manipulating him.

Well, he didn't want to be manipulated anymore, so he decided to think about Kurt's advice and follow it.

In fact, the more he thought about Kurt, the calmer he became, which was kind of weird, because Kurt usually made him anxious. He wanted to be angry at Kurt for destroying his delusions about Quinn and the baby, but he couldn't. It certainly wasn't Kurt's fault. If anything, Kurt was the only person with whom he had a completely honest relationship.

Finn was still upset by how upset Kurt had been during their conversation. Kurt had been so worried he would hate him, and Finn didn't understand that at all. Why would he be mad at Kurt? Just for telling the truth? The truth was a good thing, even when it hurt. And it did hurt. But that wasn't Kurt's fault.

No, he was mad at Quinn, and Puck, and all of the other kids in Glee who he'd believed were his friends. He was even mad at Rachel, though she didn't know the truth about the baby. He wasn't sure why he was mad at her, so he decided to think about that for a while.

He slumped forward on the couch and stared sightlessly at the blaring television infomercial.

The more he thought about Rachel, the angrier he got at himself. He liked Rachel. Well, he thought he did. But he felt like a complete dick for kissing her when he was still with Quinn. He had been chasing Rachel around and leading her on, all the while he was supposed to be going steady with Quinn. That had been a real asshole move, especially because, even though he had kissed her, he hadn't wanted to breakup with Quinn. That had nothing to do with the baby.

Well, maybe it did, but only a little. He actually loved Quinn, at least as far as he understood what love was. They had been together for over a year, and though they'd had their rough spots and sometimes she was mean to him, he still liked being with her.

So why had he kissed Rachel? And wasn't that almost as bad as what Quinn had done with Puck? Sure, he hadn't slept with Rachel, but he had still cheated on Quinn. That just was not cool. Plus, he had led Rachel on, allowing her to think they had some kind of future together. He had never said anything to that effect, but Rachel had still believed it and he hadn't done anything to disabuse her of that notion.

So why _had_ he kissed Rachel?

The more he thought about it, the more confused he became. Yeah, Rachel was hot in her own unique way, but did he like her for her or because she represented freedom from Quinn and all of his responsibilities? Were that the case, he had used her, which meant he totally sucked.

The truth was that Rachel was just as scary and domineering as Quinn, though in different ways, and the only connection he felt with her was when they were singing together. Most of the time he didn't know what the hell she was talking about and he felt that Rachel kind of thought he was stupid.

He sighed. Maybe he _was_ stupid. Rachel and Quinn thought he was, and obviously Puck did too. Lately, the only one who thought he was worth anything based on his own merits was Kurt. Kurt liked him despite his flaws.

But thinking about Kurt made him feel weird and warm and scared, so he shoved those thoughts away.

Still, Kurt had given him some really good advice. Kurt had been giving him good advice for months, but he hadn't been listening to it. So maybe he should start? He really didn't have anything to lose at this point.

Finn didn't think he would ever be able to move past the fact that Quinn slept with Puck and then lied about it, or that she had lied about the baby. He could forgive a lot of things, and maybe eventually he would be able to forgive them for what they had done, but he would never forget it. But, as Kurt had pointed out, there were still a lot of things he didn't know.

Did Puck love Quinn? Did Quinn love Puck? Had Puck wanted to tell him the truth all along, but Quinn had convinced him not to spill the beans? But how could Puck just lie to his face like that for months? Didn't their friendship mean anything?

He could buy that Quinn was terrified, and she had cause. Her parents had disowned her like she was some kind of child molester or something, like Quinn was the first girl ever to get knocked up in high school. He had always thought Mr. Fabray was a jerk.

And Kurt had a legitimate point that Quinn was treated like shit at school. She was getting a lot more abuse than Finn himself was, just because she was the one pregnant; basically because she was a girl. That was really crappy.

He still couldn't figure out why Puck just hadn't manned up and admitted he was the father. Puck really didn't give a rat's ass about his reputation. Hell, his reputation was built on the fact that he didn't care what anyone else thought of him. Plus, Finn knew that Puck wasn't the type to run out on his kid, not after what his father had done to their family. So why had he stayed silent?

Because Quinn had asked him to keep his mouth shut.

And he had. Because he loved her.

Finn sighed again and buried his face in his hands.

Why was everything so _complicated_?

 

* * *

 

Carole Hudson wearily let herself into her small but pleasant home and was greeted with the sight of her son sobbing on the couch and mumbling between gasps of air.

She blinked heavily and looked around for Quinn, who was apparently not at home. She felt guilty for heaving a sigh of relief. The girl was carrying her grandchild and she had some affection for her, but if she was being honest, she had never really cared for her. She remembered all too well from her own high school experience how girls like Quinn operated. They pasted on their angelic smiles and hid behind their perfect hair as they viciously wreaked havoc on the lives of their classmates. Finn might not have been able to see through Quinn's façade, but Carole Hudson wasn't so easily fooled.

"Baby?"

Finn startled and looked at up at her with huge wounded eyes. "Everything's so messed up, Mommy."

Carole shrugged off her coat and stowed it and her purse in the hall closet. She crossed over into the living room and gently sat down next to her son, trying to wrap an arm across his gigantic shoulders.

"What's happened, sweetheart?"

He flinched. _Sweetheart_. Kurt had called him that. It sounded better coming from him.

"Tell me, Finny," she coaxed.

So he did. And once he started, the words poured out of his mouth and ran together and he was soon babbling in an hysterical manner, as though he were excising a tumor.

The revelations came so fast that it was all Carole could do to process them. She wasn't up to asking questions just yet, so she let Finn ramble on until he began to tire himself out. Finally, once he had finished and managed to get himself under control, she began ordering her thoughts.

"Who is Kurt?"

She didn't miss the spark that lighted her son's eyes as he told her all about his new best friend. How nice Kurt was, how smart Kurt was, how well Kurt dressed. How Kurt was tutoring him in Geometry and Spanish. How Kurt helped him with his dancing for Glee Club and gave him vocal tips. How Kurt had patiently listened to his ramblings about Quinn and Rachel and the baby. How Kurt had heard about the baby and came straight to him, rather than keep it a secret like all of his friends were doing.

"Who's Rachel?"

The more she heard about Rachel, the less impressed Carole became. From what she could glean, this girl was interested in her son because she thought of him as a trophy, much along the same lines as Quinn. She wanted to use Finn's talent to take over the Glee Club and establish herself as its head.

Carole really couldn't be bothered to care about someone who would pursue and kiss a boy who was in a committed relationship and expecting a child, even if that child was not biologically his own.

"Sweetheart, are you sure you can trust Kurt?"

Finn blinked owlishly. "What?"

"How do you know Kurt is telling you the truth? Even if he is, as far as he understands it, how do you know that he didn't misunderstand this gossip?"

The explosion was immediate and surprising. Finn leapt to his feet and began gesticulating wildly.

"Don't talk about Kurt like that! Kurt is _nice_. Kurt would never hurt me!"

She meant to interrupt, but was unceremoniously cut off as her son barreled straight ahead.

"Kurt is the only one who cared enough about me, about what _I_ want, to tell me the truth! He never would have come to me unless he was sure. You don't understand what it's like for him at that school, Mom, how hard he has it, how he's treated. He went against everyone he knows. He's going to lose all his friends! And he doesn't _care_. He was so mad at them for lying to me and for expecting him to go along with it!"

Finn continued to rant and rave, delivering a stunning _apologia_ of all things Kurt Hummel, and a seed took root in Carole's head. But how to know for sure? She decided it was necessary to press a few buttons and see what resulted.

"Is this boy in love with you?" she baldly asked.

Finn reddened and immediately sat back down. "Yeah," he whispered. His brows gathered. "But he shouldn't be! Not after everything I've done to him."

Carole's eyes hardened. "Which is what, exactly?"

He flushed even further and turned his head away.

"Finn?" she prompted.

Slowly, haltingly, he began to explain. Slushies. Dumpster tosses. Pee balloons. Patio furniture nailed to rooftops. Petty vandalism. Homophobic slurs.

Carole Hudson was a god-fearing woman who firmly believed in sparing the rod and spoiling the child. She thought corporal punishment was ineffective and pathetic, but that didn't stop her from slapping her son sharply across his face.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she bellowed. "Who _are_ you? You're not the child I raised."

"But…"

"No. There is absolutely no excuse for your behavior. I'm so disgusted with you right now that I'm barely able to look at you." She shook her head. "What gives you the right to treat people like that? Why do you think you're better than anyone else?" Her hands curled into fists. "What's next, Finn? Maybe you'd like to burn a cross in Noah's yard? Perhaps you could put on a white robe and terrorize some black students at your school?"

"Mom…"

"I must be a terrible mother if I've raised you to believe that this type of behavior is in any way acceptable."

"That's not true!"

She eyed him. "Don't you _dare_ , Finn Hudson! I have half a mind to drive you over to that boy's house right now and force you to apologize on your hands and knees to Kurt and his parents."

"His dad, you mean," Finn said softly.

"What?"

"Kurt's mom died when he was a little kid."

Carole's fury knew no bounds. "Well, that's just terrific. So you've not only been abusing and humiliating a boy who's physically weaker than you, but a child who has only one parent because his other died? If _anyone_ should understand how hard his life must be, it's you!"

She stood and stormed into the kitchen. "I'm glad that baby isn't yours. You are in no way ready to be a father," she shouted over her shoulder.

 

* * *

 

Carole angrily slammed around the kitchen, banging pots and pans, clattering silverware, and in general making as much noise as she possibly could to ameliorate her rage so she didn't go back to screaming at her son.

To say that she was vastly disappointed in her only child was a gross understatement. She knew that Finn was easily led and caved to peer pressure more often than not. After all, it was why she believed he'd had sex with Quinn way before he was ready and was now preparing to bring a child into this world.

Despite what both that world and her son thought, Finn was not stupid. He was naïve and overly trusting and had a tendency to be almost childlike in his innocence. She didn't see why this was necessarily a bad thing. She was endeared by his innocence, though it sometimes frustrated her, yet she also knew that her son could be devious and manipulative when it suited, and would play the part of a dullard to escape the consequences of his actions.

He had never fooled her; he was smarter than he let on. After all, he had to maintain a C average to remain eligible for the football team, and though he sometimes struggled, she knew he was capable of doing more but was too lazy to put forth the effort. Most of the time, she was content to let it slide, wanting him to enjoy what remained of his childhood, but she could not let this stand.

The bottom line was that Finn knew the difference between right and wrong, and he had seriously wronged this Kurt Hummel.

She heaved a sigh, shook her head, and set the water to boil.

Hummel. Why did that name sound so familiar?

She gasped. Hummel was the name of the shop she regularly used for car repairs. She had met the owner on a few occasions, though their contact was always brief.

Was that bear of a man Kurt's _father?_

Good Lord, if he ever found out what her son had been doing to his, Finn would probably be on a ventilator for the rest of his life. How could she ever show her face in that shop again, knowing what Finn had done? How could she ever again look that man in the face without flinching?

"Mom?"

She turned sharply toward the door to see her son nervously lingering on the threshold.

"Not now, Finn. I'm too angry to offer you forgiveness at the moment."

He swallowed heavily. "Um, well, actually, I don't need your forgiveness," he said, wincing.

"Excuse me?"

"Kurt told me that. He forgave me and said that he was the only one who had the right to do that, since he was the one I hurt."

Carole blinked. It was hard to argue with that logic, as much as she wished to do so. It certainly sounded like Kurt had his head screwed on right. Still, she was angry and in no mood to deal with her son's nonsense.

"What do you want, then?" she demanded.

His hands fluttered. "Um, well, I don't know what to do about Quinn and Puck and the baby and everything. Kurt gave me some advice, but I kind of want to know what you think."

Carole sighed and decided to abandon her dinner plans. She didn't feel like dealing with food preparation at the moment, and since Quinn wasn't around to complain yet again about her culinary talents, she didn't see the point.

"Fine. Go into the living room. I'll order some pizza and we'll talk."

 

* * *

 

In the half hour it took for the pizza to arrive, Carole had calmed herself considerably. Not that she wasn't still angry, of course, but she knew there were other serious matters which required her attention. She wasn't going to let Finn off the hook yet, and she was going to determine if he had been bullying other children in addition to Kurt, but the situation with Quinn and the baby was paramount.

She watched as Finn inhaled three slices of pizza. Once his appetite had been sluiced to the point where he could again function, she broached the subject at hand. She could tell that Finn had been thinking about this for several hours, a great feat given his short attention span, and she didn't want to run roughshod over his thoughts. If she did, he would clam up and shut himself off.

She knew it was difficult for Finn to make decisions. Usually he spent so much time hemming and hawing, he never decided on anything, content to let others make his decisions for him. But that he had listened to Kurt's words and was now willing to listen to her own lent credence to her belief that he was seriously considering his options and their consequences, which was a step in the right direction.

"What advice did Kurt offer?"

Finn swallowed noisily and cleared his throat before beginning to recite verbatim the majority of his conversation with the other boy.

The more Carole listened, the more she liked Kurt Hummel. She could understand why Finn had been so insistent in his stance that Kurt wouldn't deliberately hurt him. And even though Kurt believed himself in love with her son, which she thought might actually be some form of Stockholm syndrome, she had to give credit where it was due. The boy was smart, logical, and knew just how to approach Finn to achieve the desired result.

It was apparent that Kurt wanted Finn to consider all of the choices available to him. In fact, it sounded to her as though the whole reason Kurt had gone to Finn in the first place was to _give_ him those choices, the ones Quinn and Noah had taken from him. He might have been in love with Finn, but first and foremost, Kurt Hummel was a good friend.

Hell, Carole wished _she_ had a friend she could depend on in such a manner.

Kurt hadn't offered himself as a choice, believing his feelings couldn't be returned, but the more Finn went on and on and _on_ about Kurt, the less sure Carole was about that. It was obvious that Kurt's feelings made Finn uncomfortable, and she wondered if that was the reason Finn had started bullying Kurt in the first place, because Kurt represented something Finn wanted to hide about himself.

She knew better than to ask outright, because Finn would merely explode and stomp away. But she was curious. She could have cared less if her son was gay or bisexual or whatever, but she knew what he would face in this town were that the case. That Kurt confronted it at all was a testament to his character.

"So what do you think about what Kurt said?" Carole asked her son.

"Um, that he's right?"

Her lips quirked. "Are you asking me or telling me?"

"Telling?"

"Hmm," she said noncommittally.

"So what should I do?" he asked in exasperation.

"I'd like to ask you some questions first."

He nodded and indicated for her to fire away.

"Are you in love with Quinn? I'm not asking if you love her, because I know you do, but are you _in_ love with her?"

He frowned. "I'm not sure what the difference is?"

She stared at him. Was he seriously this obtuse, or did he just want her to tell him what he should do so that he wouldn't have to make a decision? From everything he had told her about what Kurt had said, Kurt's advice had been framed in such a way to compel Finn to make his own choices.

She then decided that Kurt Hummel was some kind of ninja. Or perhaps he was magical. Whatever the case, he obviously had mystical powers and knew exactly what Finn Hudson was about. The boy had skills. He knew things.

"Do you want to spend the rest of your life with Quinn?" she asked. "When you think about your future, is she beside you? Are you married? Do you have more children? Is she everything you want in a partner?"

"I…I don't think so," he said carefully. "I do love her. I want her to be happy and safe, and I think I could give her that."

Carole smiled sadly. "But could she give those things to you?"

His silence spoke for itself.

"And the baby?"

His eyes filled with tears. "I love that baby. I really want that baby," he firmly declared.

Carole was silent for a long moment. "Do you want this baby, or do you just want _a_ baby?" she finally asked.

"What do you mean?"

She suppressed a sigh. Boy, he was really making her work for this. "Finn, you've always wanted children, ever since you were a child yourself. You even had names picked out. You were the only little boy on the playground who happily played House with the girls. You're very protective and loving, and once you've finished growing up yourself - though that's a long way off, given that you've been bullying kids just because they're different - I have no doubt that you'll be an incredible father."

He gave her a hopeful yet abashed smile.

"But the fact of the matter is that this is not your child. Now, I have no doubt that you could and _would_ love this baby as your own, but the bottom line is that Noah is the father; he has certain rights. You really don't know how he feels about this, and I think you have to consider that he might want this baby too. You remember how devastated he was when his own father abandoned their family. I can't see Noah doing that to his own child. He's kept silent for this long for whatever reason, but you can't assume that he'll willingly let you play father to his baby."

Finn sighed and angrily fisted his hair.

"And you also have to remember that you're no longer playing House. This is for keeps. If you claim this child, you'll always be bound to it, and thus to Quinn. When things get hard, you can't just walk away. And things _will_ get hard. Having a child is the most rewarding experience you'll ever have the privilege to enjoy, but it's also the most difficult. Having you was the best decision your father and I ever made, but it wasn't easy."

He nodded.

"I was very young when you were born," she continued, "but I had my life all planned out. Once your father returned from Iraq, he would use the GI Bill to get his college degree. By then, you would have been old enough to put in daycare or kindergarten, and then I could go back to school to get my own degree. That didn't happen. I had never even considered the possibility that I would lose Christopher. I knew about the war and that people were dying every day, but I was young and thought we were invincible. Before I could even blink, he was gone and you were all I had left."

Finn curled in on himself.

"I never regretted having you. From the moment I found out I had this other life moving through me, I knew that I would move heaven and earth to keep you happy and safe. But it wasn't easy, honey. You know how hard we've struggled. You're still in high school. In the past ten years, the world has changed drastically. You're not going to get anywhere without a college degree, and it will be very difficult to get one while you're trying to raise a child.

"Now, I'm not telling you not to love this baby. I'm not telling you not to help Quinn raise it. But I _am_ telling you that you have to think very carefully about how claiming this child will affect you and the rest of your life. I know these are hard choices, and I'm sad that you have to make them, but the fact of the matter is that you _do_ have to make them."

"That's what Kurt said," Finn whispered.

"And he was right. Actually, he was right about everything he told you."

He nodded. "Kurt's really smart."

She desperately wanted to delve further into his relationship with Kurt, but knew it wasn't the time. If anything happened, he would come to her and they would discuss it then, but she knew that, for now, she had to beg off.

"I don't want to be with Quinn anymore," Finn said. "I love her and I want to help her, but I can't be her boyfriend."

Carole said nothing.

"I can't trust her," he continued. "Maybe if she had come to me right after it happened and admitted it, I could have forgiven her and we could have moved past it, but not now." He paused. "I want to forgive her, I really do, because I don't think she planned it out or anything. I don't think she'd hurt me like that on purpose. But I'm not ready to forgive her yet. I'm not sure when I will be, but I can't make fake promises to her either."

"I think that's a very smart decision," Carole said quietly.

Finn hesitated before speaking again. "It's just…it's just," he sighed, "people at school are so _mean_ , Mom. The things they say to her, they're just not _right_. And they say them right to her face! Not that talking behind her back is any better, but people who don't even know her, who've never spoken to her before in their lives, walk right up to her and call her a slut or a whore."

Carole flinched. That was completely unacceptable. Regardless of her own personal feelings about Quinn and what she had done, that kind of harassment could not and should not be tolerated. She'd be speaking to that idiot principal very soon.

"And she's _not_ those things," Finn said with ferocity. "I'm not, like, excusing her behavior or whatever, but she's not those things."

"No, she isn't," Carole agreed.

"I got her kicked out of her home, Mom," Finn whispered. "No matter what she did or who she did it with, that was on me. It wasn't my right to tell her parents before she was ready."

Carole conceded his point with a nod. He had acted rashly and was paying for it. Unfortunately, so was Quinn. As for the Fabrays, they would also be put on her list of people to visit. She'd had enough of their ridiculousness.

"And Noah?" she asked.

He scowled. "He slept with her. I know I shouldn't hold him to a different…standard? But I do. He's been my best friend for twelve years, and he had sex with my girlfriend. And, for some reason, what he did hurts me a lot more than what Quinn did, even though it's the same thing, you know?"

She nodded.

He sighed. "I don't know if I can forgive him. I'm not even sure I want to." He stared off, effectively shutting down that particular avenue of discussion.

"What about Rachel?" Carole asked. "From what you've told me, she sounds, er, rather enthusiastic about having a relationship with you."

He shivered. "Yeah, but she's kind of scary, you know? She so intense. I mean, Kurt's intense, but not like that."

Carole knew better than to comment on that comparison.

"I was thinking about her before," he added, "about how I feel about her and stuff. But I'm really only interested in her when we're singing together. We have, like, this really amazing connection, but only when we sing. Most of the time, I'm not even sure I like her as a person. She's so bossy. Even bossier than Quinn."

Carole curled a lip. That was…pretty bossy.

"It's not like we could just go through life singing all the time. How could we build a relationship on that?"

_You couldn't_ , she wanted to say, but held her tongue.

"What would Kurt tell you to do?" she asked instead.

Finn was silent for a long moment, obviously thinking about the question. "Probably that it was too soon for me to be thinking about dating someone else when I still have feelings for Quinn, even though I don't want to be with her. Because if I did that, I'd pretty much be using Rachel as a rebound or something, and that's not fair to her." He paused. "It's not fair to me either. So I guess I should take my time and be alone for a while so I can figure out what I want."

Carole Hudson gave silent thanks for Kurt Hummel. As far as she was concerned, her son couldn't have picked a better person for his own Jiminy Cricket.

"I don't want to be alone," he softly admitted.

"Well, you're not," she said warmly. "You have me, and Kurt, and your other friends."

He snorted. "What other friends? Quinn? Puck?" He shook his head. "I thought the kids in Glee were my friends, but I guess not if they'd keep this from me. Kurt was so _mad_ at them." He blushed. "He said…he said that I was more important than Sectionals, that I was worth more than any stupid singing contest."

"And he was right," Carole said.

He blushed harder and hung his head. "If I'm friends with Kurt, the other kids will make fun of me. They'll bully me like they do him, especially Puck."

"Well," she began, "then I guess you have another decision to make."

He looked up at her and cocked his head. "What?"

"Are you Noah's boy, or your own?"


	3. Probing Questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is incredibly random. I'd apologize for it, but since it's exclusively Finn, I just decided to go with it because I find Finn himself to be incredibly random. Writing him, for me, is like free association or stream-of-consciousness. So he jumps around a lot in his head here, but hopefully it hangs together well enough to be somewhat coherent. There's also some sexual situations in this chapter. Well, at least Finn has thoughts about sexual situations. Enjoy!

Finn couldn't believe his mom allowed him to stay home from school the next day. She must have felt _really_ sorry for him.

Selfishly, he considered for a very long time as to how he could milk this situation to his best advantage. Finally he realized that him staying home from school, while fun, didn't really accomplish anything. Eventually he would have to go back and he needed to be ready.

Finn knew he wasn't a very good liar, so there would be little he could do to convince his former friends in glee club that nothing was wrong. There was no way he could offer trite brush-offs to Quinn and Puck; they knew him too well and would see right through him. He thought that was really unfair. They had been lying to him for months, yet he would never be able to lie to them and be convincing.

The more he turned it over in his mind, the more his subconscious screamed at him to admit that he knew Puck and Quinn had been lying for a very long time. He had seen the clues, the subtle cues that something had happened between them, that something was wrong, but he had ignored them and been content to do so, because he really _had_ wanted the baby.

He winced at how easily he had bought the hot tub story. He could only imagine what those who knew probably thought of him. His mom had been right the night before, though: he had always wanted kids. For as long as he could remember, he'd wanted his own children. He wasn't even sure why. He thought he'd be a good dad, so there was that. And maybe he was trying to make up for the fact that his own dad never got a chance to be a father, to prove that Hudson men made good parents or something.

That made him think about Kurt – _again_ – which really wasn't that surprising, since everything made him think about Kurt now. Kurt would make a really good dad. Finn knew this instinctively. Like, there wasn't a shadow of a doubt. Kurt did a lot of things really well and easily and all at the same time, but when they were in the choir room together yesterday and Kurt was talking about how he thought he'd never be a dad, Finn had seen the look in his eyes, like being a dad was the most important thing Kurt Hummel could ever do, and Kurt _knew_ it. Kurt should definitely be a dad one day.

That made Finn think about Kurt getting married, because Kurt said he was old fashioned and wanted to get married before he had kids. Finn really admired that. From the moment Quinn had told him she was pregnant and he was the father, Finn had wanted to marry her. He had broached the subject a few times, disguised as a future possibility, but Quinn had scoffed. Either she didn't want to be married or she thought they were too young or whatever. Finn realized now, however, that she probably just didn't want to be married to _him_. He wondered if she wanted to marry Puck. He pulled a face. He couldn't even imagine that, even if they were having a baby together.

He didn't want to think about Quinn and Puck doing _anything_ together, so he decided to think about Kurt some more. He figured since he was alone in the house, he could think about Kurt all he wanted and no one would know or make fun of him. Finn knew he was probably thinking too much about Kurt. He also accepted what that probably meant. He wasn't sure if he _liked_ what it meant, but he _did_ like thinking about Kurt. Since it was safe for him to do at the moment, he was going to think about Kurt _a lot_.

He liked Kurt; he knew that now. Liked Kurt as more than just a friend. What he didn't get was whether he liked Kurt as a potential boyfriend, so he decided it was better that he keep his thoughts to himself so he didn't give Kurt false hope or something. Also so he wouldn't get his ass kicked by the football team.

Finn didn't understand why McKinley had to suck so hard. The football team sucked, the basketball team sucked, and so did the hockey and wrestling teams. The only team that didn't suck was the Cheerios, so he kind of understood why Quinn had been so upset and pissed off when she had been removed. He imagined that if he was on a winning team – a team that won freaking national competitions – he'd probably have identified with that team to the point where he didn't know who he was without it. So, yeah, he had another reason to feel sorry for Quinn, and, with each new reason, he resented her all the more. Why couldn't he just hate her and be done with it?

He sighed.

He'd never really identified with the football team. Sure, he liked playing, and he was pretty good at it, but the team was lame and the only person on it whom he could ever tolerate was Puck. He could never trust Puck to have his back again, probably because one knife there was more than enough. The more that he thought about it, the less he understood why he was on the team at all. He had never really felt like a _jock_ and he had never taken advantage of the status the label afforded him. Not like Puck and the others had.

Finn had only ever dated Quinn, and he had been happy with her. Or he thought he had been. He'd never dated or slept around. He'd had a few beers, but he'd never been drunk or smoked pot or tried the other drugs kids brought to the jock parties. He'd just never been interested. He didn't even like most of the people he had once considered his friends.

Not that they had ever really been his friends. That had been pretty obvious once news of Quinn's pregnancy had gotten out and everyone turned on them. That had been a really harsh blow. Not that Finn hadn't seen it coming, but he supposed he had been happy believing the lie. Now that he thought about it, he seemed to enjoy believing lies which he thought would make his life better.

He'd believed the other kids in Glee were his friends, but obviously that was just another lie.

Except for Kurt.

Kurt had never lied to him, Finn realized. Never. Not once.

Other than his mother, Kurt was the only person who had never lied to him. Wow.

Another _check_ in the _Why Kurt is Awesome_ file Finn had organized in his head: _doesn't lie_.

Kurt could've lied to him, Finn knew. In fact, it would have been easier on Kurt if he _had_ lied. Kurt could have gone along with the rest of Glee, keeping him in the dark about Quinn and Puck and Drizzle, but he hadn't, because Kurt loved him. Honestly loved him.

And Kurt had told him the truth about that, too.

Even though it was a truth Finn had already known, even though it was a truth that had nonetheless shocked him to hear, he was still happy that Kurt had admitted it. Kurt _loved_ him. He wasn't ashamed of it. He didn't hide from it, nor hide it from others. Kurt was proud of the love he had for him, even though Kurt believed it was a hopeless love.

Finn couldn't deny that he liked the fact that Kurt loved him. He took comfort in it, because it proved that he _was_ loveable, that maybe Quinn and Puck were just creeps who had used him and taken advantage of him, that maybe he was just too trusting and not _stupid_. People had been warning him for a long time now about Kurt: how being friends with him was dangerous, how Kurt was out to rape him or something – which was not only really mean, but really _dumb_. He was pretty sure he could totally take Kurt, if he wanted.

That thought repeated itself in his head and suddenly took on an entirely different connotation.

_He was pretty sure he could totally take Kurt, if he wanted._

He could _take_ Kurt…in that way…if he wanted.

Whoa.

Of course, he didn't know if that were true. Sure, Kurt loved him, but that didn't mean Kurt wanted to have sex with him. Quinn had loved him, or said she did, but she had never wanted to have sex with him.

But Kurt was also a teenage boy, just like him. Surely that meant that Kurt got horny a lot, like he did. He couldn't even imagine a horny Kurt. Kurt was always so in control of himself that Finn wasn't sure Kurt actually had hormones.

And then it was a like a big set of doors pushed themselves open and a flood of images were set free. Most of those images involved a very naked Kurt, and Finn didn't have a problem with that at. At _all_. And that concerned him. But it didn't stop the images.

Did Kurt jack off? Did Kurt jack off while thinking of _him_? Because that…was kind of hot.

Scratch that. _Very hot_.

The idea of cold and aloof Kurt, always so tightly wound, touching himself and moaning Finn's name was the hottest thing Finn had ever thought about. And suddenly Finn was so much more _aware_ of Kurt than ever before.

He must have been paying far more attention to Kurt than he had realized, because he had no problem imagining what Kurt looked like naked. Kurt wore really tight clothes, so it wasn't too difficult to picture Kurt out of those clothes. And even though Kurt was always covered up, Finn had seen glimpses of Kurt's skin, that pale, smooth skin, and how completely flawless it was. The long legs.

That ass.

He wondered how big Kurt's junk was. He was guessing pretty large, if the way Kurt's pants fit were any indication. Was Kurt's junk bigger than his own? That would be weird. Finn was pretty proud of his junk, not that he'd had much occasion to show it off. Still, he knew he had no reason to be embarrassed. He was definitely bigger than Puck, which was pretty…what was the word? Moronic? _Oxymoronic_. He'd never _purposefully_ sought out Puck's junk, but Puck showed it off to everyone, strutting around the locker room like a peacock. Come to think of it, that was pretty gay.

Finn was actually grateful that Kurt loved him and not Puck, because he knew that Puck would've totally played Kurt, just for the opportunity. He could imagine Puck sleeping with Kurt and then bragging about it to everyone, how he'd even gotten a leg over on the gay boy. And what was really fucked up was that Finn knew Puck's rep would only grow because of it. No one would care that Puck had a nailed a dude, only that he had nailed _someone_. What was so special about being a whore anyway? Stupid Puck.

The totally irrational and unwelcome thought of Puck taking Kurt away from him entered Finn's mind. Not that Puck ever could, not that Kurt would ever allow it, but if Finn was with Kurt, he somehow knew Puck would try something. Kurt's words in the choir room yesterday came back to him and Finn realized how true they were. If he managed to forgive Puck, would Puck do it again? Would Puck try to steal Kurt just like he had stolen Quinn? Not because Peck necessarily wanted Kurt, or even Quinn, but just to take something away from him? Because that was a sick thing.

And that's why what Puck had done hurt far more than Quinn's part in all of it.

Even though he loved Quinn, he loved Puck more. Puck was supposed to be his _best friend_. When had that changed? When had Puck become the dude who slept with his best friend's girl? Did Puck not like him anymore? Had Puck ever liked him? Had Puck been using him for all of these years, just riding on his coattails to popularity? Finn knew that Puck was only popular because he himself was. Sure, Puck got laid a lot, but people, even the girls he slept with, didn't really like him. People either feared Puck or wanted to fuck him. Most people didn't even know Puck, and they had never known _Noah_.

The thought almost made Finn feel sorry for Puck. Almost.

_Man, screw Puck_ , his brain advised, _and not in the gay way. What's Puck ever done for you?_

Not much, Finn admitted. Puck had just gotten him into trouble a lot. Granted, his trouble was his own making, especially all of the bullying he had done to other kids, but Puck had instigated it and Finn had gone along, in part to appease Puck. And now he wondered why he had done that. Why had he been so desperate for Puck's approval? What did he care what Puck thought of him? And why was he even surprised that Puck had cheated on him?

_That's_ _it_ , he realized.

That's why he was so much angrier at Puck than he was at Quinn. _Puck_ had cheated on him, on their friendship, on everything Finn had believed they meant to each other. Yeah, he had been exclusive with Quinn, but he had often put Puck before her. As gross as it sounded, and it sounded pretty douchey, Finn had believed the whole _bros before hos_ thing. Last night his mom had asked him if he could imagine a future with Quinn, with them being married and everything, and he hadn't been able to do it. However, he _had_ believed that his future would always include Puck and their totally awesome bromance.

And Puck had destroyed that without so much as a second thought.

And even if Puck did feel badly about what he had done, it didn't matter, because Puck had made his choice, and that choice wasn't his friendship with Finn.

That really, really _hurt_.

And now he had no friends, no real ones. The kids in Glee certainly didn't count. How could they keep something like this from him? Just for Sectionals? And for the first time, Finn began to believe the words of Kurt and his mom: maybe he _was_ worth more than any singing competition.

Kurt was his real friend, his _true_ friend. Kurt didn't lie to him. Kurt helped him with homework. Kurt always answered when he called. Kurt always made time for him, even when it wasn't convenient. Kurt listened to his problems and didn't get all judgmental.

Hell, how many months had he been hanging all his shit about Quinn and Rachel on Kurt's shoulders? And Kurt had just taken it, and had even given him really awesome advice. Stuff that Finn had already known but needed someone else to validate for him.

Kurt _validated_ him. Kurt listened to him. Kurt talked _to_ him, not _at_ him or down to him. Kurt didn't make him feel stupid, even though Finn knew Kurt was so much smarter than him that it was ridiculous. But Kurt had never made him _feel_ that way.

Quinn always had. So had Puck, really. They had always acted like they were doing him a favor by being his friend, and somewhere along the line, Finn had started believing that too; that if he didn't have them, he didn't have anything. He had pushed away other friendships in favor of Puck and Quinn. They were always discouraging him from hanging out with other people. Both of them had told him to keep away from Kurt.

He had thought it was just because Kurt was gay, but now he wondered about that. Maybe they had realized that Kurt would be a better friend than they had ever been. Finn had seen how Kurt treated his friends, and it was with an equality that he had never experienced, except with Kurt himself.

He had also seen how Kurt's friends treated him.

Mercedes acted like she owned Kurt. She was kind of like Puck and Quinn when it came to other people entering Kurt's orbit. She didn't want them there. There was only room for her. Finn realized that Mercedes must have known that Kurt loved him. He imagined Kurt had told her, because he told her everything. Finn had always assumed that the wary, angry looks Mercedes shot at him was because she was worried he would break Kurt's heart, but what if that wasn't true? What if Mercedes had been afraid that he would take Kurt away from her?

For a moment, a brief moment, Finn fantasized about doing just that, about keeping Kurt all to himself, about making someone hurt like Puck and Quinn had hurt him. Kurt probably would never have allowed it, but it was kind of fun to think about, having someone just be all about you. Of course, he probably wouldn't have liked Kurt so much if that ever happened. One of the things he most admired about Kurt was that Kurt always made up his own mind, in his own time, and didn't let other people do it for him. Kurt was, like, his own person. Finn kind of envied that.

Still, he couldn't believe that Mercedes had actually expected Kurt to keep silent about Drizzle. It was like she didn't know him at all. Heck, Kurt had said as much. He wondered what Kurt would do about it, if anything. He rather thought Kurt _would_ do something about it. Kurt wasn't the type of person to abide treachery.

Another item on the list was checked. _Kurt doesn't keep secrets that hurt other people._

Finn hadn't paid much attention to Kurt during their freshman year, other than to help torture him, but he had known that Kurt was really good friends with Artie and Tina. Over the past year, Finn had seen that, after Artie and Tina had begun dating, they had kind of shunted Kurt off to the side. They didn't like him any less, but they didn't have as much time for him either. Finn felt ashamed, because he knew he had done the same thing to friends of his when he had started dating Quinn. He hadn't even really given it a second thought, and how much of a dick move was that?

Kurt must have been so lonely. For a long time, Finn had believed Kurt was only hanging out with him because he was in love with him, even if Finn hadn't been able to admit that to himself. But everything was different now. Kurt truly considered him a _friend_. Kurt hadn't told him about the baby because he was love with him. Kurt had been honest because he couldn't lie to a friend.

And that was just so _awesome_ , because it made Finn understand that Kurt would have done the same for _anyone_ he considered a friend. It had nothing to do with the fact that Kurt was in love with him, but because Kurt just _loved_ him, like you were supposed to love friends.

Kurt could've kept the secret. Kurt could have feigned innocence and tried to get even closer to him, hoping that when it came out, Finn would turn to him. After all, that's what everyone was expecting Rachel to do when she found out about the baby. And Finn could totally imagine Rachel doing just that, which was actually pretty horrible.

But Kurt couldn't do that. Not that Kurt couldn't lie about stuff, because Kurt lied all the time, but it was usually to protect himself. Finn could understand that, given how badly people treated Kurt just because he was gay.

It was so _stupid_ , Finn thought. Who cared if Kurt liked boys or girls? How did it affect anyone other than whoever Kurt was dating?

He felt a pang at the idea of Kurt dating anyone.

If that ever happened, he knew Kurt would still be his friend, but everything would change. It always did when people started dating. And there had to be some guy out there who was probably crushing on Kurt. One in ten, right? Even if that was an overestimation, there was sure to be _someone_ who liked Kurt. That was worrying. He'd deal with it later.

Kurt was hot, and it was only now that Finn realized he had always thought so.

Why wasn't he freaking out more? Because he wasn't. He wasn't freaking out at _all_.

Weird.

He hadn't freaked out yesterday when Kurt had told him he loved him. Sure, he had been surprised, but mostly because Kurt had confirmed what other people had told him, what Finn himself had known to be true. Kurt loved him, and Finn thought that was…pretty awesome. He just hadn't told Kurt that. He wasn't sure he should.

He didn't love Kurt, he knew that. He still loved Quinn. But he thought it was _possible_ that he _might_ be able to love Kurt.

And it really had nothing to do with Kurt being a boy. It was just that he was _Kurt_. Huh.

Wow. Why did people have to make life so much harder than it really was?

He wondered what it would be like to have sex with Kurt. He didn't get much past that idea, because he didn't actually know what two guys did in bed. Sure, he had an _idea_ , but he didn't _know_.

_That_ was when he started freaking out.

What if he was having sex with Kurt and he _hurt_ Kurt somehow? Kurt was just a little bit of a thing! He was so tiny and cute and sweet and nice, and bitchy and evil to those who pissed him off. It was adorable. What if he injured Adorable Kurt while they were having hot gay sex?

He assumed gay sex was hot, because all sex was supposed to be hot.

He needed to find out more about gay sex.

Luckily, Finn Hudson was a master of Google-Fu.

 

* * *

 

Wow.

_Wow_.

"Wow."

Finn stared at the laptop screen in awe, fascination, and just a little bit of disgust.

First he had read up on gay sex, because he figured there was probably more to it than straight sex, given where dicks ended up. And he was right, because there was lots of information on stuff you should do to make sure your partner – he liked that word better than _boyfriend_ , at least as far as Kurt was concerned; of course, Kurt was the _only_ boy he was considering as a potential partner – enjoyed stuff.

There was fingering and stretching and actual _douching_ and lube and positions and pillows beneath hips and all kinds of stuff Finn had never even thought about.

Did guys have to take this stuff into consideration when they had sex with girls? He wasn't sure. He knew that you could finger girls, but he had never done it, so he didn't know if it was necessary or if girls even liked it. Were the vaginal muscles as tight as the sphincter muscles were supposed to be? If so, he imagined sex must be painful for girls, too, especially the first time.

Was Quinn a virgin when she had slept with Puck? For all its absurdity, Finn couldn't help but hope that Puck had been gentle and made it good for her. It would suck to regret or even hate your first time.

He wanted Kurt to enjoy their first time.

He blinked. "Oh, _wow_."

Yeah, he had really just thought that.

"Breathe," he told himself. "Don't freak out."

And he didn't.

He didn't freak out about the idea of having sex with Kurt, but he _did_ at the idea of telling Kurt that he liked him back. Because what if he did and then Kurt decided he didn't love him anymore? He'd seen Puck do that to girls all the time. Once they returned his interest, he had no interest in them at all.

Okay, Kurt probably wouldn't act like that, but if Kurt knew he liked him back? Well, that was a whole host of other problems.

First, Finn knew he only _liked_ Kurt; he didn't love him, not yet.

Second, he had told his mom last night that he shouldn't date Rachel because he'd be using her as a rebound; well, he sure as _hell_ wasn't going to use Kurt that way. Even the _idea_ of him hurting Kurt made Finn himself hurt.

Third, Kurt would probably want to be public about their relationship.

Well, that didn't really bother him. Why shouldn't Kurt want to be with his partner in public? Everyone else could do it, so why couldn't they? Because the more Finn thought about Kurt standing at his side and holding his hand, the less he worried about what other people thought.

He then remembered something his mom said a lot: "Other people don't pay my bills, so I really don't care what _other people_ think about me."

She made _other people_ sound like an entirely different race or class or something, like humanity could be divided into Good People and Other People. Maybe they could.

His mom was a Good Person. So was Kurt. Finn hoped that he himself was a Good Person, even though he knew he had done some Bad Things.

Well, if that were the case, he could only assume that Quinn was therefore a Good Person. Yeah, she had done some Bad Things, like sleeping with Puck and bullying Rachel and other girls, but he couldn't really judge her for that, because he had bullied Kurt. Maybe Quinn felt badly for bullying people? Should he ask her?

He didn't know what to think about Puck. _Noah_ had been a Good Person, but _Puck_ had done tons of Bad Things. Still, Finn knew that Puck really did love his mom and his sister, so he couldn't be all Bad.

He supposed Mr. Schuester was a Good Person, and probably the other kids in Glee were Good too, even if they did some Bad Things.

What about people like Coach Sylvester and Santana Lopez? They did Bad Things all the time and seemed to enjoy it, but Finn knew that Sylvester genuinely cared about the Cheerios, even if she treated them like crap. Santana loved Brittany, even though she was sometimes mean to her, too.

He was very confused. Was everyone both Good and Bad? Did some Good People just do Bad things and vice versa? If so, how could you tell who they really were?

Still, Finn thought that he had been allowing _Other_ _People_ to rule his life for far too long. In the end, why did he even care what they thought of him? They didn't pay his bills. Hell, after graduation, he'd probably never see most of them again. He was actually looking forward to it.

The guy in the porn movie playing on his laptop finally got his nut and Finn was sharply reminded of what he had been doing and he moaned in tandem.

After he read up on gay sex and how to make it safe and good, he had decided he needed more information. Porn was the next logical step.

He'd never before noticed that the porn site he regularly visited had a gay section, so he clicked it out of curiosity. If truth be told, he'd kind of been curious about gay sex long before he'd started hanging out with Kurt. Mostly he wondered how it worked, because wouldn't it hurt, like, a lot?

But the stuff he had read said that, while it might hurt at first, as long as you were careful and took your time, it was awesome.

Like, amazingly awesome.

Apparently there was this thing in your butt called a prostate. The prostate was a bundle of nerves and if it was pressed in just the right way, it was like all kinds of alarms and bells and whistles went off and you had, like, a really hardcore orgasm or won a stuffed animal or something. Finn was all about hardcore orgasms, and stuffed animals were pretty cool, but he wasn't sure he was ready for something to go up his butt.

Gay porn was utterly fascinating. Once he started looking at it, he couldn't stop. For some reason, gay porn, to Finn, seemed somehow much more…intimate than straight porn. For one thing, the guys were really into it, at least in the pornos he was watching. It wasn't like straight porn, where you could tell the girl wasn't into it at all. Of course, that could've been because the guys in straight porn were so gross. A lot of them were way older than the girls, kind of fat, and had bad skin and hair. He supposed the girls got hazard pay or something. Maybe workman's comp.

But in gay porn, all the guys were hot. It must have been a requirement or something. Good.

Finn had come across the phrase _gay-for-pay_ in his research. He didn't understand that at all. If you had sex with guys as your career, how could you not be gay? Or at least bi? How the hell did the dudes in gay porn get wood if they weren't really interested in fucking other dudes? It sounded like major denial to him. He supposed they could've used that stuff that gives you wood for four hours and then you have to go the hospital, but that seemed kind of extreme. Did porn really pay that well? And wouldn't it be embarrassing to go to the hospital because you had a boner that wouldn't go away?

But in all the gay porn he'd seen – and he'd watched a _lot_ – the guys had been _super_ into it. Like, they couldn't get enough.

Whenever he'd watched straight porn, Finn had been put off by the guys who were loud when they were fucking, but the screamers in gay porn excited him, especially when the bottom was begging for it. The only thing better was when they gagged for it. Even the blowjobs looked a lot better in gay porn. Maybe because they had the same equipment, guys just naturally knew how to give awesome blowjobs?

He wondered what dick tasted like.

He wasn't sure he'd be able to blow Kurt right away. He'd probably have to work up to it. Maybe he should practice on bananas or cucumbers or something?

He was pretty sure a decision had just been made. He also realized he hadn't given Rachel a second thought in a really long time.

Besides, as long as the dick was clean, he supposed it tasted like the rest of your skin, like when you sucked on your finger after you cut it. He was sure Kurt was clean. Kurt was the cleanest person he'd ever known, even more than every girl he'd ever met.

And, yeah, okay, he had totally thrown the most epic boner ever when he had fantasized about Kurt blowing him. Probably because Kurt had those big lips.

Finn thought Kurt was probably a screamer in bed. Kurt just looked like a screamer, or what Finn thought a screamer looked like. Not that appearances were everything. After all, he regularly had to stuff a sock in his mouth when he jerked off because he got so loud. He was pretty sure his mom was on to him, but he just couldn't help it.

He started panicking. What if, when Kurt was just about to blow him, his mailman problem reared its ugly head? That would make things super uncomfortable. But the idea of him blowing a load on Kurt's face or down his throat was enough to make Finn's eyes roll back in his head.

He should probably take Kurt on a date first, though.

He wondered how long he and Kurt would date until they had sex. Not that he was in a rush, and he'd want to do a lot more research first, but he couldn't help but think about it. He also wondered how they'd go about it. What if Kurt wanted to fuck him? That idea scared him a little. Well, a lot, really. But he'd also read that just because you were gay, that didn't mean you had to have anal. It was nice to have options.

Still, it kind of seemed like a waste if you skipped the buttsex. Why else would God give guys prostates? And that just totally proved that God loved gay guys.

But what if Kurt wanted to be on top? Well, he pretty much knew that however it went down, even if Finn himself was the one doing the fucking, Kurt would still be on top. Kurt would probably just ride him and give a lot of orders. That was pretty hot, too.

Then he thought about actually _fucking_ Kurt, of how it would _feel_ , and Finn creamed his sweatpants without any warning whatsoever. So hard, in fact, that he lost his hearing for a moment. Cool.

Then Finn had an _Idea_.

He hesitated for a moment before reaching into his pants and swiping a finger at his cock. He brought his hand out and considered the come on his fingers. Should he?

Why not?

He put his finger in his mouth and almost vomited.

It tasted _disgusting_.

Holy shit, how did guys, or girls for that matter, swallow after giving a blowjob? It was so _hot_ and _creamy_ and way too salty, and it also tasted like vinegar and metal. Was that normal?

What if it wasn't? What if it was just him? What if his come was the worst-tasting come ever? Kurt would never want to blow him, and Finn wouldn't blame him. He needed to do more research. Maybe there was something you could do to change the taste of your come.

He bet Kurt tasted a lot better.

Finn blinked.

Oh, yeah. He was gay. Super gay. Totally gay. At least for Kurt.

And, really, he was pretty sure Kurt was all he needed.

But first he had to take care of Puck and Quinn, and do so in a way that minimized the impact on Kurt. Kurt had tried to protect him, so he was going to do the same for his…future partner?

Well, once he got around to telling Kurt that he liked him back.

Right now, he would settle for Kurt being his best friend, which the boy already was. Kurt was the best _best friend_ he'd ever had, and he wanted to do this right. He wanted to get to know Kurt properly, spend time with him and stuff.

It would take him little while to confess to Kurt just how much he liked him – well, probably a _really_ long time – but he was going to do it. He was going to man up and be with the person he wanted to be with, and _not_ just because Kurt wanted to be with him.

But because Kurt, like Cybill Shepherd in those old commercials, was worth it.


	4. Interactions

Finn spent the remainder of his day alternately plotting to protect Kurt and furiously masturbating to the idea of him in various states of undress. He was only moderately worried by how _unworried_ he was about the allegedly shocking revelation of his sexuality.

He realized that it was nothing more than what he had known, what he had been denying, if only to himself and in his own mind, for quite some time. He wasn't exactly comfortable with it, but not as uncomfortable as he had been expecting. He had truly believed that once he legitimately acknowledged his super-secret gay feelings that somehow everything would change. But it hadn't.

Other than determining conclusively that Imaginary Kurt was awesomely skilled at blowjobs, nothing had changed.

But shouldn't it have changed? Wasn't that what he had been so scared about? That everyone would think he was gay and all of the rumors and insults since he had joined Glee would automatically achieve credibility? Wasn't that why he had been so terrified that he denied his friendship with Kurt to anyone who would listen until only recently? Wasn't that why he had chased after Rachel, who was the less hot, female version of Kurt?

"Whoa."

That was _true_ , he now realized. Kurt and Rachel were a lot alike: mouthy, talented, smart, and hot. But, as Finn had told his mother, Kurt wasn't as intense as Rachel, whose wheelbarrow full of crazy could be seen from space.

"That's not nice," he chided himself.

No, it wasn't, but it was true.

"I like Rachel!" he insisted.

_You do not_ , his brain argued. _What you like most about her is how much she likes you_.

Well, yeah. That was really shallow, though. Was he such a shallow person?

_You're sixteen_.

There was that, he supposed. But what was he going to do about Rachel?

_You're supposed to be with Quinn. Just remind Rachel of that._

And, suddenly, Finn Hudson had the Best Idea Ever!

He was going to fix everything. He'd protect Drizzle, thereby helping Quinn and, unintentionally, Puck. He'd let Rachel down gently. He'd make his mom proud of him.

And he would get Kurt.

He was really looking forward to that last one.

 

* * *

 

It was about three in the afternoon when he finally snapped out of his orgasmic state and he rushed around the house lighting candles and spraying room freshener to hide the scent of his activities before his mother returned home.

He didn't know why he was so uncomfortable. He was sure his mom knew he jacked off. All boys did. And after last night, he was pretty sure his mom knew that he liked Kurt. It had been really cool that she hadn't pressed the issue, probably believing it was something he had to work out on his own. He knew she wouldn't care that he liked Kurt. Well, she'd _care_ , but she wouldn't be upset by it. His mom was just cool that way.

He was really lucky. He wondered if Kurt had come out to his father and, if he had, how Mr. Hummel had handled it. Finn suddenly felt an entirely different protective streak toward Kurt. What if Mr. Hummel had been a dickbag about the whole thing? That wasn't cool. He'd have to ask his mom if Kurt could move in with them. Finn wouldn't mind sharing his room with Kurt.

Not at all.

He blinked out of his Roommate Kurt fantasy an hour later when the doorbell rang.

He looked through the peephole and was excited to see Kurt waiting on the other side of the door.

 

* * *

 

Carole Hudson arrived home after another grueling day at the office. She opened the door to the house and was accosted by a cacophony of pleasing scents. It smelled like every candle in a five block radius had lit itself and then come to live with her. There was also another aroma, one so delicious that her mouth immediately watered.

Had Finn prepared dinner?

Her eyes widening at that horrifying thought, she hurriedly removed her coat and stored it and her purse in the hall closet and rushed toward the kitchen, noting with worry that the delectable smell increased exponentially the closer she got. She was so focused on the house _not_ burning down that she quickly strode past the dining room and ignored the soft murmurs coming from within.

Just as she was about to enter the kitchen, she blinked and began retreating, turning on her heel and peering nervously into the dining room.

"Honestly, Finn," said a thoroughly unimpressed voice, "I am more than happy to help you with your homework, but I will not do it for you. You and I both know that you are far more intelligent than you let on or believe, but if you're going to whine and insist that you're a dullard when we both know that's not the case, then don't waste my time."

Carole blinked rapidly. Who the hell was talking and how did they have her son's number? Whoever it was had just earned her eternal respect.

"But Kurt!" Finn pleaded. Well, _whined_ , was more accurate.

Carole stifled a gasp.

Kurt!

Kurt Hummel, the magical ninja, was in her home!

"No whining!" Kurt snapped. He then released a very much put-upon sigh. "Finn, if you believe for one moment that you will be able to charm me into doing your work for you, let me state unequivocally that, no matter how much I love you, I will not be used."

Carole slapped a hand over her mouth. Kurt loved Finn! She had known as much, but here was Kurt admitting it!

She eagerly leaned forward. What would happen next? This was better than _Desperate Housewives!_

"Further," Kurt sniffed, "I sincerely doubt that your teachers, no matter how inept, will accept the idea that you've become a model student overnight."

Finn pouted. "Can't we watch TV?"

Kurt sighed. "I already told you that we could watch television after you've completed your homework and we've eaten dinner."

Carole started dancing. Kurt Hummel was going to eat dinner with them! She'd get to see him interact with her son in Finn's natural environment! She felt like Jane Goodall!

"Where's your homework, then?" Finn grunted.

"I've already finished it," Kurt shot back, "and don't change the subject. Now, we've managed to get your grades up in Geometry and Spanish. I plan to add History and English, as well. By the end of this year, you _will_ be on the honor roll if it kills you."

Finn sighed dramatically. "Why is this so important to you?"

Carole almost bent in half, determined not to miss a word.

Kurt was quiet for a very long moment. "You're smart, Finn. I know you don't think you are, but it's true. It bothers me that you care so little about your future that you're willing to sacrifice your intelligence and your college education to live up to the stereotype of a dumb jock. That is not who you are, and by the time you realize that, so many opportunities will have passed you by. I won't let that happen to you."

Carole felt her heart leap into her throat. She didn't care if her son was straight. She was determined that he would date Kurt Hummel, at least until graduation.

"Why do you care so much?" Finn asked softly, embarrassment and insecurity coloring his voice.

"Because I love you," Kurt whispered. He paused a moment. "It's so weird to say that and not feel afraid that you're going to hurt me."

"I would never hurt you!" Finn protested.

"I know that now," Kurt replied, "but doesn't it bother you when I say it?"

"Not really. There's nothing wrong with loving someone. I'm glad you love me. I'm…proud that you could love someone like me."

Carole frowned. What did that mean?

"Someone like you? What does that mean?" Kurt demanded.

Carole swooned.

Finn briefly hesitated. "I think you've built me up too much in your mind. I'm not smart, Kurt. My whole life people have been telling me that."

"Well," Kurt said coldly, "those people are assholes."

Carole nodded furiously.

"You don't curse!" Finn insisted.

"I do when I'm irritated," Kurt said, "and I'm very irritated right now. Finn, I want you to listen to me, okay? I want you to hear what I'm about to say and really _listen_ to my words. Will you do that?"

"I can do that."

"That's not what I asked," Kurt said. "I know that you're perfectly capable of hearing me. What I want is for you to listen and truly consider this. I want you to lay aside, even if only temporarily, what all those other people have said to you. Will you try?"

"Yeah."

"Good." Kurt paused. "Finn, the problem, as I see it, is that too often you listen to the wrong people. You let their small opinions and their small minds influence your behavior far too much. I don't care what some idiotic third grade teacher told you about your intelligence. I don't care if Puck told you that you need to dumb yourself down in order to be acceptable to the squalling masses of other students. I don't care what Quinn told you in the heat of an argument.

"Once we graduate, it's likely that you'll never see these people again. Why do you care what they think of you? How is what they think ultimately of any relevance? You are _more_ than what people think of you. You believe that I've exaggerated your good qualities, but I think it's much more likely that you've undermined yourself so badly that you no longer recognize that you in fact _have_ good qualities."

Tears began slipping down Carole's cheeks.

"Don't cry, Finn," Kurt whispered. "Please don't cry. I'm not saying this to hurt you. I'm saying it because it needs to be said. You're a _good_ person, Finn. You try to so hard to please people, but you've never taken the time to please yourself. You've allowed the expectations of others to pile on you to the point where you don't have expectations for yourself, and that is wholly unacceptable."

Finn sniffled. "What do you mean?"

"I don't love you because you can catch a football. I don't love you because you have a good singing voice. I don't love you because you're standing by Quinn when you don't have to."

Kurt fell silent for a moment.

"I see the wonderful husband and the excellent father and the truly decent human being I believe you will one day be. You _care_ about people, Finn. Even when you're saying or doing something you know is wrong, you care about people. You never want to hurt anyone, and that often leads to you hurting yourself.

"When I look at you, I see the man you'll become if you allow yourself, and _that's_ the man I love. That's the man I want to know. And that's the man I want to help you discover."

A pregnant silence followed and Carole stuck her head into the room to determine the reason. Her son was staring at Kurt Hummel with nothing less than total and complete adoration, and poor Kurt was blushing severely and looking down at his hands.

Her eyes widened. Kurt Hummel was _beautiful_. He was an absolutely stunning boy, but that paled in comparison to the beauty of his character.

As the silence continued to loom, a tangible air of awkwardness began to infiltrate the room and Carole determined to save the boys from it. She quickly dried her face, quietly crept back to the front door and opened it, before shutting it loudly.

"Finn, I'm home!"

She heard two chairs squeak in protest as the boys hurriedly stood up to greet her.

Carole suddenly felt nervous and she had no idea why. It wasn't as if she was being introduced to Finn's boyfriend – not yet, anyway – but she wanted to make a good impression. It mattered to her what Kurt thought of her. It was peculiar, for she had never cared what Quinn thought of her. Not that she herself had thought much of Quinn.

She pasted on a bright smile and strolled down the hallway. "What smells so good?"

"See, I told you," she heard Finn whisper.

She raised an eyebrow and rounded the corner.

"Mom! This is Kurt!"

Kurt stepped forward and held out his hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Hudson."

Such manners!

Carole smiled and took his hand in hers. "It's lovely to meet you, Kurt. Finn has told me so many wonderful things about you."

Finn nodded furiously as Kurt blushed and ducked his head. Carole wanted to pinch his cheeks.

"Thank you," Kurt demurred, looking up shyly at Finn, who beamed back.

That was when Carole noticed the change in her son.

Finn was in love with Kurt. He knew it and accepted it, but had yet to tell the boy in question. That was acceptable for the moment. She wouldn't force the issue.

That didn't stop her from planning their wedding.

 

* * *

 

"So what smells so good?" Carole asked, repeating her earlier question.

"Kurt made dinner!" Finn exclaimed.

Carole blinked and looked at Kurt, who again blushed. "You didn't have to do that, sweetheart. You're a guest in our home."

Kurt balked slightly at the endearment before a warm flush of pleasure suffused his face.

Carole chastised herself for being overly familiar with Kurt, but then remembered that he had lost his mother when he was a child. Suddenly her heart hurt for the boy who must have felt so alone and isolated in a town like Lima. Her furor at his bullying, in which her own son had participated, was instantly reignited, though she suppressed it.

"Kurt likes to cook," Finn explained, "and he's really good at it, but he won't tell me what he made. He even kicked me out of the kitchen!"

"So that you would start your homework," Kurt shot back.

"But I'm hungry," Finn whined.

Kurt rolled his eyes. "You're _always_ hungry."

"I'm a growing boy!" Finn protested.

"If you grow any more, your mother will have to remove the ceilings of this house."

Carole snickered.

"Mom!"

"No whining," Kurt reminded him.

Finn settled for a sullen pout.

Carole marveled that they already sounded like an old married couple. She looked at her son and arched a brow. "Is your homework finished?"

"No," Kurt immediately replied.

Finn glared at him. "Yes, it is. That paper isn't due until next week!"

Kurt put his hands on his hips and glared right back. "You've yet to choose a final topic. If you can tell me right now just what it is that you want to write about, I'll let it go and serve dinner."

Finn blinked. "I want to write about _The Scarlet Letter_. I think Hester got a really raw deal, and even though we're judging the storyline according to modern standards, I think Hawthorne was actually trying to expose the hypocrisy of the Puritans. Plus, her daughter was a huge bitch, which was like, the worst thing ever. Hester had to go through all of that crap and get saddled with a pretentious little snot like that?" He shook his head. "So wrong."

Carole stared.

Kurt nodded. "An excellent thesis. It needs to be polished, but there's certainly enough evidence in the text to support it."

Finn grinned. "Yay."

Kurt again rolled his eyes, this time in fondness, and began marching toward the kitchen. "Mrs. Hudson, please rest until dinner is served. Finn! Set the table."

Finn began trailing after him. "You can't boss me around in my own house."

"This isn't your house," Kurt snapped back, "it's your mother's, and I will boss you around as much as I want."

They continued arguing good-naturedly as the kitchen door closed and all Carole could wonder was what the hell had just happened.

 

* * *

 

"This is delicious," Carole moaned around her forkful of food, the explosion of tastes dancing across her palate like a gorgeous ballet. Her appreciation for this meal knew no bounds. She couldn't remember the last time she didn't have to cook for herself and Finn.

"Thank you!" Kurt tinkled.

"It must be healthy," Finn said gruffly, "since you won't tell me what it is."

Kurt raised a brow. "And yet you had three servings and are working through your fourth."

Finn blushed and Kurt patted his shoulder.

Carole watched discreetly as the eyes of both boys widened at the touch, as though it were electric.

Finn carefully chewed his food and swallowed heavily. "What, um, what is this exactly?" he asked, averting his eyes shyly.

Kurt arched a brow. "At the moment, you're shoveling down a medley of roasted winter vegetables."

Finn paled. "I thought it was potatoes," he whispered.

Kurt smirked. "Well, there are potatoes in there, but it's mostly onions, cauliflower, parsnips, rutabaga, and turnips."

"You're trying to poison me!"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "You're ridiculous. Be quiet and eat your vegetables."

Finn did, though rather sullenly. He refused to admit that said vegetables were absolutely delicious, however, still feeling as though he had been deceived.

Kurt was trying to seduce him with delicious vegetables. That was not okay.

Except that it was totally okay.

Kurt could seduce him whenever he wanted, with implements of his choosing.

Carole was rather disappointed that the silence wasn't awkward. She kind of liked Finn being all unseated around Kurt and wanted to provoke such a response. She knew it was totally evil of her, but she liked seeing her son this way, happy and shy and vulnerable all at the same time.

Kurt was good for her son.

She cleared her throat. "Finn didn't tell me you were coming over today, Kurt," she said sweetly, ignoring the narrowing of her son's eyes.

"Oh, please don't hold him responsible, Mrs. Hudson!" Kurt pleaded, eyes wide and hands flapping _adorably_. "Once I realized Finn was not present at school today, I decided to drop by just to see for myself that he was okay, as well as to bring him his assignments."

He smirked. "After all, finding out that your girlfriend and best friend committed adultery behind your back and lied about the paternity of the child you believed to be yours is no reason to fall behind on schoolwork, is it?"

Carole thoroughly chewed the bolus of food in her mouth and then calmly set the flatware down on the table, eyeing him. "You're good."

He arched a brow. "You have no idea. Brass tacks?"

She inclined her head. "By all means."

Finn was completely lost and the expression on his face clearly indicated as much.

Kurt tilted his head. "I'm in love with your son. You know this."

She nodded. "I do."

He nimbly cut a piece of chicken. "I'm interested in your thoughts on the matter."

She took a sip of wine and considered her answer. "I have no problem with it," she finally said. "It's obvious you're not a predator. You understand Finn's character, but you don't take advantage of it. You're a good student and appear to be a very kind and likable young man."

Finn dropped his head into his hands.

"I presume Finn has explained to you his past treatment of me," Kurt said.

She stiffened. "He has," she said darkly.

He nodded. "I'm concerned that you believe I love Finn because I am overly identifying with my tormenter."

Finn blinked. "What does that mean?"

Carole meant to distract him, but Kurt wouldn't allow it.

"Your mother thinks it's possible that I love you because, in the past, you hurt me, and I might have developed feelings for you because I like being hurt."

Finn shook his head in confusion. "That makes no sense. That's a sick thing."

Carole had to admire his tenacity. Kurt was determined to include Finn in the discussion, not talk over him or down to him, as Quinn and Noah often did. She well knew that Finn wasn't stupid, but he did require explanations for modes of behavior with which he was unfamiliar. He had a tendency to take things literally, and metaphorical language often confused him. So too did formal diction and polysyllabic words. He could understand them, but they made him nervous and insecure. She wondered, and not for the first time, if Finn had some kind of attention deficit disorder.

Kurt nodded. "Indeed, and, in this case, it's also untrue."

Finn sighed with relief. "That's good. It would be kind of gross if you liked me because I was such an asshole." A thoughtful look passed over his face. "That would explain a lot of Puck's dates, though."

Kurt smirked. "Very much so." He turned to Carole. "I love him because he's Finn Hudson. That's really all there is to it."

Finn blushed so severely that sweat broke out across his nose.

Carole regarded him for a very long time, pleased by his candor. He wasn't intimidated by her as a parental figure, which she both admired and found disarming. He treated her as an equal and demanded that same respect, and it was, she had to admit, refreshing. After two years of Quinn's placating simpering and a lifetime of Noah's flirting, straightforward honesty was new and enlightening.

She was also impressed that Kurt didn't deny his feelings for Finn. She was fairly certain that Finn hadn't elucidated to him the details of their conversation last night, so either the magical ninja was _just that good_ , which was highly probable, or he was psychic, which wasn't out of the realm of possibility at this point.

"I can't allow his treatment of you to go unpunished," she said evenly.

"Oh, I'm not suggesting that you do," Kurt smoothly replied. "It's not my place to tell you how to parent. I just want to you to know that no punishment could make Finn regret his past actions anymore than he already does and, frankly, I much prefer that he reached that conclusion on his own rather than being shamed into it."

Wow. He really _was_ that good.

"You're _very_ good," she admitted.

"I'm exceptional," Kurt said, "and so is your son."

Church. She had to book a church. It would probably have to be the Universalist-Unitarian one, but that was fine. Now, what to do about flowers?

"Thanks, Kurt," Finn whispered.

Kurt patted his hand. "It's simply the truth." He cleared his throat. "Now, about your paper."

Finn groaned and dropped his head onto the table.


	5. Intersections

Carole enjoyed the two hours Kurt spent with her and Finn after dinner, though she had spent the majority of that time watching the two boys interact with each other.

Kurt was mostly shy and awkward around Finn, likely due to the fact that Finn was now aware of Kurt's feelings, but he became articulate and verbose about issues on which he had strident opinions.

Kurt Hummel had a lot of opinions.

For the most part, Carole agreed with those opinions, which only made her like him more. She was also pleased to note that when Finn disagreed with Kurt, Kurt listened patiently to Finn's point of view and then they would discuss their differences. Finn had always been so hesitant in expressing his opinions to Quinn, for when he did, she'd run roughshod over them, either dismissing them or huffing that Finn didn't have the right to make up his own mind.

Kurt didn't do that. If Finn disagreed with him, Kurt accepted it, they clarified certain points, and then moved on. Carole couldn't help but wonder if this was truly Kurt's character, or if he was merely curbing himself while in her son's company.

She liked Kurt, she liked him a great deal, but she didn't know him. He was sweet and kind and bluntly honest, but she couldn't get a handle on him. She couldn't easily determine how much of his behavior was real and how much was artifice created to impress Finn and herself. She hesitated to believe that a teenager could be so diabolical, but she knew Quinn Fabray and Santana Lopez. She'd known Noah Puckerman since the boy had been in Pull-Ups. She knew how manipulative her own son could be.

Once thing she knew for certain was that she wouldn't be underestimating Kurt Hummel anytime soon.

She was also concerned by how eager Finn was to get close to Kurt; physically close, to be exact. When they sat down to watch television, Finn maneuvered them so that he was between her and Kurt, ostensibly to make it more difficult for she and Kurt to speak to each other, thus diverting their attentions from Finn. She also noticed that, as time progressed, Finn would inch closer and closer to Kurt, until their shoulders, and finally their hips and legs, were pressed against each other.

She didn't interfere because she wanted to see what would happen, how Kurt would respond to Finn's solicitousness. She had no ready answer. Kurt would blush and avert his eyes, as though flattered, but he was also plainly wary and more than a little nervous, perhaps even scared. Still, he didn't object.

Given that Finn had been bullying Kurt, she could understand that reaction. She was also unnerved that Finn seemed oblivious to Kurt's discomfiture. What worried her more was the possibility that Finn _had_ clued in to it, but was ignoring it. The very idea made her irrationally angry at Finn and protective of Kurt.

When Kurt finally announced that it was time for him to go home, Carole was relieved. She had enjoyed his company, but Finn was acting like a lovesick fool and she wanted to have words with him.

As Kurt walked toward the front door, Finn donned his trademarked Hurt Look and trailed after him like a lost puppy. Carole gave them their privacy but made sure that her presence had not gone unnoticed.

After Kurt escaped and Finn returned to the living room, Carole pounced.

"What was that?" she demanded.

"That was Kurt," Finn said dreamily, a dopey grin on his face.

Carole narrowed her eyes. "I'm aware," she said slowly. "Are you aware you were making him uncomfortable?"

Finn appeared floored. "No, I wasn't!" he protested.

"You were," she said firmly, "and I think you know it."

A look of guilt flashed in his eyes. "He's scared of me," Finn said quietly. He shook his head. "I don't want him to be. I have to get him used to being around me. It...it hurt that he flinched every time I touched him."

She raised a brow. "Do you understand why he did?"

Finn hung his head, ashamed. "Yeah," he whispered.

"Do you like Kurt?" she asked. "Do you like him as more than just a friend?"

"Yeah, I think so," Finn said, raising his head to gaze at her defiantly.

She sighed. "You're moving too quickly. Didn't Kurt warn you about that?"

"Well, yeah," Finn admitted, "but he wasn't talking about himself!"

Carole glared. "Finn, you need to dial it back a little. You can't force him to feel something he doesn't."

"But he likes me!" Finn insisted. "I know he does because he told me!"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes, but he doesn't think you like him back. More importantly, he doesn't believe that you ever _could_. As far as Kurt knows, you love Quinn and have feelings for this Rachel person. How do you think it made him feel that you were obviously flirting with him when he believes you're straight and involved with two girls?"

Finn blanched. "I didn't think about it like that," he whispered.

"I can assure you that Kurt did," she shot back. "He was probably wondering if you were setting him up for a prank or if you were going to add him to your harem."

Finn frowned. "What's a harem?"

She groaned and rubbed her temples. "You need to slow down," she said. "It's obvious that, though he likes you..."

"He loves me," Finn said, a note of triumph in his voice.

Carole threw her hands up. "Fine! He _loves_ you, then. That doesn't mean, however, that he's ready for a relationship with you. Just yesterday, you sat on that couch and told me that you weren't ready for a relationship with Rachel because of your feelings for Quinn. You said that you could no longer be with Quinn because she had betrayed and lied to you. You said that you should take some time and be alone so that you could figure out what you wanted."

"I did that last night and today!" Finn said. "And I decided that I want Kurt."

"You're acting like a spoiled child," she admonished. "Two days ago you thought you were having a baby with one girl while you were chasing after another. Now, you've decided that you're bisexual and want to be with the boy you used to bully for being gay."

"But I really like him, Mom," Finn whined, "and I researched gay sex and everything!"

Carole's eyes widened. "Sex? You researched gay sex? What in the world does that even have to do with anything? It's apparent that you're not ready for _any_ kind of sex, and I sincerely doubt that Kurt is either." She scowled. "If I get even an inkling that you're pressuring Kurt for..."

"I would never do that!" Finn roared, shooting to his feet.

"Sit down!" she barked. When he did, she took a cleansing breath. "I'm sure you wouldn't," she continued, "at least not intentionally, but you need to think things through more carefully. You've never dated a boy, Finn. You and Kurt, despite what you both feel, don't know each other very well."

"I know I need everything I need to know," Finn said, "and Kurt's wonderful."

She conceded his point with a nod. "Has he ever had a boyfriend before?"

"No," Finn said slowly.

"Even if you weren't pressuring him, would Kurt feel as though he had to have sex in order to keep you as his boyfriend?"

Finn was horrified. "I wouldn't do that to him," he mumbled, stung.

"I'm not saying you would, honey," she said gently, "but what if Kurt believed that was part of the deal? You have to understand that tonight might have been the first time a boy touched him in a manner that wasn't violent."

Understanding and anger, most of it self-directed, dawned in his eyes. "That's not right," he whispered, shaking his head. He closed his eyes. "And I did that to him."

Now Carole began experiencing guilt, wishing that she hadn't been so heavy-handed in her approach. "You need to give both Kurt and yourself some time, sweetheart. If you want to be with him, then first you need to end thing with Quinn and Rachel, and you need to do it in such a way that they don't blame Kurt."

Finn nodded.

"You also need to tell Kurt that you have feelings for him, genuine romantic feelings, and that they're not a joke. You need to be able to look at him and convince him that you want to be with him not because you're lonely, and not because he's available, but because you honestly like him."

She paused. "I don't believe it will be as easy as you think. It's going to take time and a lot of effort. Even though Kurt admitted he loves you, he doesn't believe you could love him back. He's forced himself to accept that reality, even though he's mistaken. It won't happen overnight. You're going to need to be patient and reassuring, and I know that can be hard for you."

Finn sighed glumly, but nodded to indicate he had heard her words.

"Please don't get angry," she said warily, "but I noticed that Kurt is very bossy, and he bosses you around in particular. Wasn't that a problem for you and Quinn?"

He nodded. "Sure, and for me and Rachel, too, but it's different with Kurt. Quinn and Rachel boss me around to change me, to make me behave like they want." He shrugged. "Kurt's not like that. He bosses me around so that I'll be better, but still be me, like with grades and stuff. He knows I can do better and gets frustrated when I don't, and frustrated Kurt is all kinds of adorable."

Carole gave an exaggerated blink.

"Kurt doesn't boss me around because he thinks I'm stupid," Finn said slowly. "He bosses me around because he's trying to motivate me. He knows I'm lazy and put stuff off. When he bosses me around, though, he doesn't do it in a mean way, like Quinn does, or to manipulate me, like Rachel does. It's like when I tease him for being prissy and huffy. He gets that I'm not angry or making fun of him; it's just teasing."

She nodded and decided to let it go, knowing she needed to approach this next part carefully. "You also need to think about what the reaction will be if you two begin dating, because we both know what people will say."

"I don't care about them," Finn said. "They don't care about my feelings."

"All right," she said. "I can understand and even appreciate that, but you need to consider Kurt's feelings on the matter. He's been bullied for being who he is, Finn, and, if you get together, that will only increase."

"I won't let anyone hurt him!" he staunchly declared.

"You can't be with him every minute of the day," she said reasonably. "You told me about the phone calls he receives. You told me that people have defaced his property outside of school. That's not going to stop just because you're dating. It might even get worse, and those horrible people will target Kurt because they think he's weaker than you."

Finn blinked. "He's not, you know. He's much stronger than me."

"Perhaps in some things," she allowed, "but he's physically weaker than you, Finn. He's almost a foot shorter than you are, and probably sixty pounds lighter. I'm sure he'll have a growth spurt, much like the one you had when you were a freshman, but Kurt's an easy target, and you need to think about that."

Finn anxiously bit his lip.

"You need to think about the fact that the football team won't like this. They might decide they don't want you on the team."

"I don't care," he said, waving a dismissive hand. "Football's okay, but I'm not in love with it, and the team sucks."

Carole make an impatient noise in her throat. "And Noah? How do you think he's going to react to this?"

"He can't have Kurt!" Finn bellowed, once again rising to his feet.

She stared at him, utterly flabbergasted. "Why on earth were those the first words out of your mouth? Why would you think Noah would even want Kurt?"

"Puck wants everything I have," Finn said. "He's like...he's like Ron Weasley, or even Draco Malfoy."

She understood enough to recognize the Harry Potter references, but was confused by them.

"Puck had to have Quinn because I did," Finn continued, "and I've seen him checking out Rachel, too. If I was with Kurt, Puck would try something with him."

"Just to take Kurt away from you?" asked a skeptical Carole.

Finn's eyes lighted with knowledge. "Yeah, but also because he was the one who was leading all the bullying. He was the one who targeted Kurt. He was the one who led the charge to the dumpster every morning. I was there, and I didn't stop it, but I mostly held Kurt's bag and jacket.

"Puck was the one always putting his hands on Kurt, and he was real careful not to hurt Kurt physically. Now that I stop and think about it, it was all about him getting to touch Kurt. He'd let others help, but only to grab Kurt's feet or something. He didn't let anyone else put their hands on him."

Carole's brows gathered. She couldn't dismiss his arguments; they had merit. Noah had always been a jealous person, and as Finn had been his best friend, a lot of that jealousy had been aimed in Finn's direction. She hadn't been too surprised upon discovering Noah had slept with Quinn, nor was it out of the realm of possibility that he had seen Finn and Rachel together and decided to stir up trouble there, as well. She could understand Finn's worry.

She then thought about Noah's hypersexuality, which frankly concerned her. She'd heard the rumors of him sleeping with friends of hers, the mothers of his own friends. He'd flirted heavily with her in the past, until she had put a stop to it by threatening him with a frying pan. She also knew that Noah was very aggressive and had violent tendencies. Now, she couldn't help but wonder if there was a reason for them she hadn't previously considered. The more she thought about her son's words, the more she conceded they were probably true.

"All of that aside," she said cautiously, not wanting to stoke his ire further, "I think it's a fair possibility that, were you and Kurt to date, Noah would try to make things difficult for both of you, but mostly Kurt."

Finn nodded. "That's why I need to get someone else to control him."

She raised an impressed brow, surprised he had given this any thought at all. "And who would that be? Quinn?"

"Maybe," Finn said, "but I was thinking about Santana."

Carole's eyes bulged.

"See, I think Puck might actually really like Quinn," he added, "so she has some sway over him, but not enough where Kurt is concerned. Plus, she doesn't like Kurt, even though he's been supportive of her, more than almost anyone else. So the first thing I need to do is put Quinn on a guilt trip. She's super Christian, so I think it will work." He shrugged. "Besides, she put me on one for months. I kind of owe her."

She stared.

"Santana will be a harder sell," he acknowledged, "but my secret weapon there is Brittany. You know they're dating, right? It's, like, the worst-kept secret of all time, and it's totally unfair that people are fine with Santana and Brittany, but would have a cow over me and Kurt."

"So you think that because Santana is dating a girl, she'd be sympathetic?"

Finn snorted. "She has no sympathy for anyone. The point is that Brittany and Kurt are friends. She really likes him. A lot. You know, that way. And she's upset that he can't like her back, but she accepts it because he treats her really well. She just wants him to be happy. So all I need to do is get Brittany on my side, and she'll turn Santana. Santana will protect Kurt because it will make Brittany happy, and Brittany being happy is the only thing that makes Santana happy."

Carole's migraine from the previous night was returning in full force. Still, despite the convoluted logic, she could see the brilliance of her son's plan.

"With Santana, Quinn, and Brittany all in Kurt's corner," he continued, "that will make the Cheerios side with him, too, and since they run the school, Kurt will be untouchable."

He beamed smugly.

Carole decided she needed a strong drink. She'd forgotten how _Hunger Games_ high school could be.

Not that she'd read those books, of course. Or _Twilight_.


End file.
